The Hijab
THE FIRST STEP
The first step is always the most difficult. Nobody ever has an easy first foot out. Don't tell me you set your foot out of your baby crib and ran a marathon on the China Wall. Because I am NOT believing that. The minute you make a footprint on the shores of this world walking towards the tranquil of faith; the waves from the social turbulence begin attacking before you could even make a trail.
The first Hijab steps have to bear with a LOT of challenges:
- Names-calling: Ninja, Turtle (yeah, two names, not Ninja Turtle), Potatoe Head, Housemaid (Maasi), and what not ...
- Assumptions: "She's under peer pressure", "She's trying to please somebody; the family of the boyfriend she is pursuing for marriage; the guy himself maybe", "It's her twenties hormones, she'd get over it"
- Fashion advice: "If you loosen it a bit your face would look less fat", "If you show a bit of hair you won't look this round" - Okay, fat and round ... anything else?
HIJAB SEQUELS - The poorly directed
When a Muslimah is going through the stage where she is confused about her Hijab decision. there are several styles she may try to please herself. This is basically a stage of self esteem issues where you wish to please others and satisfy their critics and comments rather than pleasing Allah (swt). And so ... come the Hijab sequels. And we ALL know that badly directed movie sequels are never better than the original because you always manage to kill the real essence or two of the original screenplay. Look what happened to the SAW series. Okay ... bad example. But hey ... mutilating the Hijab is pretty much gore and disgust right?
There are sisters who would partially cover their heads and consider it as "something is better than nothing". There is no halfway Hijab solution, ladies. There was the halfway Hijab, the transparent Hijab, the accesorized Hijab with earrings and neck showing ... and of course the airbrushed Hijab when you think it is okay to wear lipstick and kohl.
Why were these transitions happening? Simple! The sisters have gone nuts! :) And besides that there are self-esteem issues. Unless you learn to love yourself in your Hijab those bits about the Ninja Turtle would hurt you. And you've got to learn ... you've got to discover how to feel beautiful and comfy in your Hijab.
Mind you - my beautiful fashion frenzied sisters - that Hijab is not only to bandage your head up with a cloth and leave the rest of you like an uncovered jar of honey. There are bugs out there and you are sacred trust. Hijab is an entire psychology; a lifestyle change, which includes your ENTIRE dress code, your makeup, your walking style and your speaking style. EVERYTHING has to be themed to reflect modesty and piety! We're talking about the Muslimah brand here, ladies, no CK, no DKNY, no Gucci, no nothing! Brand: Muslimah! 100% HIJAB-ification.
WEAR THE CROWN WITHOUT THE HUMP
No camel humps please, thank you. They look GORGEOUS on camels. Unless you wish to be one. Women with camel humps have been cursed by the way. Read the hadith in the graphic above. The Hijab has to cover ALL of your hair. Do not try showing off the new Garnier Fructis volume effect or the highlights. You can have a full open hair parade in your house before all mahram members, or in an all ladies party, etc. But a no-no in public.
Hijab is the crown that a Muslim woman wears on her head. Wear it right to LOOK like modest royalty.
DON'T BE A COSMETICS PARADE IN THE HIJAB
I know that the Loreal, Maybelline, Mac and etc. are awesome but not in public, ladies! Once again ... wear them before the ladies - and your mahrams! And if your intention behind the Hijab is purely to please Allah (swt) then I can bet on it He would make you look beautiful. So get rid of your inferiority complexes. You can always put on a colorless chaptick in case your lips are chapping off.
Also, you cannot pluck your eyebrows! You can remove the extra hair you have on the area above the bridge of your nose which is NOT part of your eyebrows. BUT ... you cannot choose to shape your eyebrows or thin them out. Believe me, they just invented plucking for nothing! If you have super thick eyebrows and you thin them out, your eyebrow line would show like a swollen plump wad of skin. Because the skin from where the tuffet of hair grows out is a bit thicker! Stop ruining the natural look.
You can always clear the nasty facial hair like if you have a moustache growing or a beard!
ACCESSORIZE not EXCESS-orize
Accessorizing the Hijab is a beautiful art but again ... who are you doing it for? If it's an all ladies party - go for it. If it's your wedding, mashAllah. But if you're off for groceries or window shopping and you have earrings dangling - astaghfirullah. There is no way you can find it okay to show your adornments to men. What shows of you naturally is just fine. But earrings, bangles ... reserve them.
Cover Girl VS Covered Girl
Hijab is a dress code. So it is not okay for you to reveal the curves and shapes. It is not only to wear a loosely fitted shirt but also to take an extra cover over your chest to absolutely erase all impressions of it. The extra cover is mentioned in Surah al Nisa in the Quran i.e. a whole chapter on Woman. It seriously says “extra cover” over the chest. So a shirt won’t do. The Hijab wrap should extend all the way. Or take an additional scarf. Or wear a jacket. I figured coats and jackets would be brilliant for the winters and extra scarf would work beautifully for the summers. The arms too need to be covered all the way till only your hands are uncovered.
To avoid throwing away my entire wardrobe – because I never wore strictly full sleeves – I purchased some sleeve extensions from eBay Alhamdulillah. They have it there and you can buy them. They’re in various colors so you can always tone them with your shirt’s color or contrast them.
Also, it is mentioned in the Quran and hadith that when a Muslim woman walks, people should be able to make out the shape of her body and the distinction between both her legs when she walks. A Jilbab is the best option but sometimes we have personal intolerance for it, or there are cultural issues. It’s better not to attract unwanted attention in a western country. The long gypsy skirt is a great alternative. Either that or really baggy trousers. My personal style is the gypsy skirt. It doesn’t have a tight fitting, not body hugging and when coupled with a super loose shirt and a Hijab it is a brilliant dress!
O! And by the way ... the feet too are part of your awraah (the parts to be covered) according to the Ruling of Fiqh (Islamic Code of Conduct) about covering feet. Some schools of thought make it permissible for feet to be uncovered. But the Hadith narration says that when Rasool Allah (salAllahu alehe wa alehi wassalam) pointed only to the face and the hands when he was asked which parts of a woman can be uncovered. So I got socks! Loads of them!
Keep your feet decorated with Henna if you like, wear anklets, whatever ... but make sure there are no non-mahrams around!
Keep your feet decorated with Henna if you like, wear anklets, whatever ... but make sure there are no non-mahrams around!
Take special care about the fact that you cannot pray with NAIL COLOR on! Why? Because your Wudu (ablution) - the washing and cleaning ritual before the prayers - is VOID when you have nail color on since it forms a thick non-penetrable coat over your nail so your nail is still unclean inside. And there is no such thing as making Wudu and applying nail color and assuming they are clean under there FOREVER! So you might as well stop using the nail color . And if you are a crazy nail art and color fan then buy those glue on nails and paint them with all the colors of the rainbow if you want! OR ... WAIT TO GET YOUR PERIOD when you won't be praying and can apply the nail color. Phew! If it's that big a deal. But WAIT ... you cannot really go public with that because WAKE UP CALL!!! it is an adornment. So you've got to cover it up and show it at that ladies parties where you can show it off.
I don't like all that hassle of doing all this so I quit nail color altogether. I'd probably put some on my wedding day and make my husband remove it later on because I have really lost the hang of the smell of nail color remover.
Also ... according to the Ruling of Fiqh (Islamic Code of Conduct) it is against the Fitraah principle to allow the nails to grow long because it is unhygienic AND the appearance of long nails is repulsive because animals have long talons and claws. Men and women with long nails are condemned. I know I don't wish to be listed as in resemblance to an animal!
Cut the Givenchy Overload Out
A woman who sprays herself in perfume and walks out like a fuming bouquet is described as being equal to an adulteress who invites people towards herself. I wouldn’t want to go anywhere near that term. Do you?
It doesn’t imply here that you roam around with foul body odor! Please! There’s always a Halal way to things. Bathe early morning and use a mild body spray INSIDE your clothes – preferably on your undergarments – spray a good, effective body spray in SMALL quantities. This shall not smell all rosy out of your clothes and will also keep body odor away! And NO! Even Itar or Musk are not Halal for a woman to use explicitly.
AN IDEAL MUSLIMAH
i was wearing hijab since i was small...but then in one part of life i threw it away n started for different way of life for few months, where i left prayers, n wear immodest attire. but then again...after that i had severe depression n i felt so empty..this worldly enjoyment is killing me slowly from the inside...masyaAllah, i truly felt that life has no meaning...
ReplyDeleteafter that i realized the only way to live is by the path to Allah...and i wear hijab again...but with more precautions than before...loose clothes, covering chest, etc...
and i am still on the journey...as it never ends...the true hijabi, true muslim...
Assalamoalekum :)
ReplyDeleteMiracles are always happening. We just need to learn to recognize them. We are so blinded by the supernatural phenomenon of the society's glam, blinded by the glitz of the media and its cooked up fantasies, that we fail to recognize a miracle. When your heart was direct by Allah (swt) to the right path for the second time - that was a miracle dear sister.
Congratulations on finding your miracle. Alhamdulillah. Hold on to it.
My question...well rather comment. I feel disconnected with other muslim women and I think it is because I don't wear hijab. So, do you women look differently on women in the faith like myself?
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